I started filming with my camera phone and putting footage together to form something that is watchable.
The process is rather filled with unknown and uncertain. At first i have a visual image of what i want to record. When i started to record more and more footage that i thought will be interesting. Then i put them together, cut certain shots, zoom in and out, re-positioning. The funny thing is that i have no idea what's the theme is about but i am guided and inspired by the footage and the music for the theme.
'Whole' is shot at Sembawang beach, It's a small beach but rather crowded.
Wednesday, November 27, 2013
Saturday, November 16, 2013
The relationship hole
Relationships are not meant to fill in the hole but to add to the whole of who you already are.
In the past, I was unconscious mistaken by relationships and unconsciously using it to fill in the 'hole' or the sense of lack with my partner. Of course, there's true love involved but the ego's sense of control tends to creep in. The ego mind creates a sense of unsatisfied, lacking, fear of loss, jealousy and so on. Soon afterwards, you will be demanding on how your partner should be/should be not in order to satisfy you. True love comes from the acceptance of your partner. I only realized it after the loss.
We have built bigger shopping malls, bigger playground, desire to be more and more attractive... all for the sake of filling in or covering up the deep sense of loss/lack. We want to gain more and more; more friends, more connections, more knowledge, becoming more enlightenment...There's nothing wrong with learning unless you are using it to be 'more'. We often use distractions to fill in the hole that will always be unfilled.There's why we are always doing and seeking to escape looking inwards.
The mind tends to be always convey thoughts of lack. The lack can comes from comparing yourself to someone else. "She has more friends than me, he is more talented than me." or " i have nothing". These thoughts are illusion of gain and loss but they felt real because of the emotions that comes with these thoughts. You feel 'good' when you have more than the other person. That's why we often craves to be 'more' so we can feel good about ourselves. It's not about growing anymore, it's about having power to control, having the power to be above everyone.
There's only the joy in learning, exploring and creating. There's no ' I do it so that i can be above someone '. Passion is joy.
In the past, I was unconscious mistaken by relationships and unconsciously using it to fill in the 'hole' or the sense of lack with my partner. Of course, there's true love involved but the ego's sense of control tends to creep in. The ego mind creates a sense of unsatisfied, lacking, fear of loss, jealousy and so on. Soon afterwards, you will be demanding on how your partner should be/should be not in order to satisfy you. True love comes from the acceptance of your partner. I only realized it after the loss.
We have built bigger shopping malls, bigger playground, desire to be more and more attractive... all for the sake of filling in or covering up the deep sense of loss/lack. We want to gain more and more; more friends, more connections, more knowledge, becoming more enlightenment...There's nothing wrong with learning unless you are using it to be 'more'. We often use distractions to fill in the hole that will always be unfilled.There's why we are always doing and seeking to escape looking inwards.
The mind tends to be always convey thoughts of lack. The lack can comes from comparing yourself to someone else. "She has more friends than me, he is more talented than me." or " i have nothing". These thoughts are illusion of gain and loss but they felt real because of the emotions that comes with these thoughts. You feel 'good' when you have more than the other person. That's why we often craves to be 'more' so we can feel good about ourselves. It's not about growing anymore, it's about having power to control, having the power to be above everyone.
There's only the joy in learning, exploring and creating. There's no ' I do it so that i can be above someone '. Passion is joy.
Sunday, November 10, 2013
The thinker
The thinker's functions is to analyse and conceptise - thinking. The thinker can't experience any feelings/emotions.
The Experiencer is the one that is aware of the thinker's functions. The Experiencer is the one that feels and experience.
When the thinker stops its' function, the Experiencer becomes aware of itself. The Experiencer has realized his/her true identify.
The thinker is just the surface of the river, the Experiencer is the depth of the river.
The Experiencer is the one that is aware of the thinker's functions. The Experiencer is the one that feels and experience.
When the thinker stops its' function, the Experiencer becomes aware of itself. The Experiencer has realized his/her true identify.
The thinker is just the surface of the river, the Experiencer is the depth of the river.
Saturday, November 9, 2013
My only one film
I been doing this one film for around 5 months.
Recently i felt i wasn't going anywhere with this film. I had doubt with myself, with my ability. Fear arise soon afterwards and i was thinking to drop this film. Perhaps i should go to a film school to study film. Later on, i realized that it's my fear that is stopping me. Like every person, i fears failure. I afraid that my film will disappoint.
After the realization, the fear and the worries dissolves. It does seem that every setback is teaching you something and perhaps even giving you greater power to continue on your path.
Recently i felt i wasn't going anywhere with this film. I had doubt with myself, with my ability. Fear arise soon afterwards and i was thinking to drop this film. Perhaps i should go to a film school to study film. Later on, i realized that it's my fear that is stopping me. Like every person, i fears failure. I afraid that my film will disappoint.
After the realization, the fear and the worries dissolves. It does seem that every setback is teaching you something and perhaps even giving you greater power to continue on your path.
Friday, November 1, 2013
Seeking for enlightenment
I can say that enlightenment just can't be seek or achieved. Enlightenment is the moment you realized that you are already 'whole' and there's nothing for you to seek or achieve in order to gain something more. There's no need to gain more spirituality, achieve some level of enlightenment. Enlightenment is a state of beingness, the natural state of the true self.
"The seeker seeks enlightenment not knowing that the seeker is the enlightenment"
At first, it could be required that one needs to be a seeker in order to find the unseekable. It's a natural process of evolution and also a paradox. Why? because seeking is always finding some kind of 'thing' from the external world and the seeker always lose himself in the external seeking. Seeking involved a lot of thinking and struggle. Once you thought that you found the thing you are looking for, the next moment it has vanished. You are looking for your identify in the external world.
The external world includes your own thoughts, believing that every thought form is you. Looking for yourself in the mind. You don't need to think about how to live your life, you just live it.
Focusing on your breathing is a great way of just being 'beingness'. As you focus on your breath, you lose the focus in your head and going down into the present moment. A natural state of peace and joy.
It does not mean you lose your thinking mind nor you lose your desires. The mind is still operating but you are not totally absorbed and believe in your thoughts, you choose your thoughts. You still have your goals and desires but you will not lose yourself in them. 'Stress' is a condition from a old state of thinking. Now in the new state of consciousness, there's joy in doing.
The mind plays a lesser role eventually as you being to surrender control and resisting/reacting. Always be aware of your complaining.
"The seeker seeks enlightenment not knowing that the seeker is the enlightenment"
At first, it could be required that one needs to be a seeker in order to find the unseekable. It's a natural process of evolution and also a paradox. Why? because seeking is always finding some kind of 'thing' from the external world and the seeker always lose himself in the external seeking. Seeking involved a lot of thinking and struggle. Once you thought that you found the thing you are looking for, the next moment it has vanished. You are looking for your identify in the external world.
The external world includes your own thoughts, believing that every thought form is you. Looking for yourself in the mind. You don't need to think about how to live your life, you just live it.
Focusing on your breathing is a great way of just being 'beingness'. As you focus on your breath, you lose the focus in your head and going down into the present moment. A natural state of peace and joy.
It does not mean you lose your thinking mind nor you lose your desires. The mind is still operating but you are not totally absorbed and believe in your thoughts, you choose your thoughts. You still have your goals and desires but you will not lose yourself in them. 'Stress' is a condition from a old state of thinking. Now in the new state of consciousness, there's joy in doing.
The mind plays a lesser role eventually as you being to surrender control and resisting/reacting. Always be aware of your complaining.
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